“If you don’t know where you are going
how can you expect to get there?”
Basil S. Walsh
Never having been a fan of the word “resolution,” which sounds too much like a demand or requirement, a family tradition has evolved over the years that leaves us with more positive and optimistic feelings. Each year we spend the week between Christmas and New Year’s up at our little cabin in the north woods. Over the last few days of the year, each of us is making a list of the things we have accomplished over the past twelve months and setting several goals for the New Year.
We compile these goals and achievements into a single document and then, after we eat dinner on New Year’s Eve, we sit in a circle in our sunroom, hopefully watching the snow gently falling on the white pines, and read them aloud in two parts. No one reads their own, however. Each child first reads the accomplishments of the next oldest child, then I read Terry’s and he reads those of our youngest child, who is now 18. The hope is that by reading achievements of someone slightly older but close in age, each will be inspired for the New Year.
Next we move on to the goals, in the same manner. It is always a pleasant and somewhat surprising experience to become aware of how many things each of us has accomplished over the past twelve months and encouraging and inspiring to hear what each hopes to achieve in the upcoming year. We generally finish the evening by playing board games, then watching the ball drop on Times’ Square. The tradition provides a nice closing touch to the old year and a hopeful start to the new one.
Achievements and goals vary from the practical and down-to-earth to those harder to quantify. What qualifies is up to the individual and his or her perceptions of what they feel good about and hope to achieve. One year a very practical achievement that was important to me was, “We now have only one baby in (cloth) diapers!” Other practical achievements have included “I worked out six days a week throughout the year” and “I dropped that last five pounds.” For the kids, achievements have included “Making the A Honor roll,” “Being selected for drumline in pep band,” “Getting a part in the play,” and “Being accepted to a college” of choice.
Goals for the New Year are often harder to measure. Some get added every year and become continuing goals for us to work on. One that has appeared for nearly 20 years is that of “Being good parents to our children, being gentle and understanding with them and imparting good values, helping them to become responsible and productive citizens of the world in which we live.” A bit lofty, perhaps, but a worthwhile objective nonetheless!
It does not matter what your goals and achievements are. What matters is that at some time during the year, be it New Year’s Eve as it is for us, or on your birthday or some other significant date, you sit down and take stock. You look to the past, then look to the future, seeing from whence you have come and setting your sights on where you want to go. Our quote above is true—we must know where we want to go to actually arrive there.
Remember, as Lewis Carroll said,
“If you don’t know where you’re going,
Any road will get you there.”
Rather, for each of you, my New Year’s wish or suggestion is, as Pamela Vaull Starr said rather eloquently, to
“Reach high, for stars lie hidden in your soul.
Dream deep, for every dream precedes the goal.”
So set your sights high, choose your path and proceed, full speed ahead! There may be challenges or impediments in your path, but you may surprise yourself and achieve some truly great and amazing things! What do you have to lose, other than the next twelve months of your life? Happy New Year!
